Living in the tension

Tension is a required element in every story.  What’s going to happen next?  It is the foundation of great storytelling.  Even when you know the outcome, the tension of how the journey progresses is fascinating.  

Tension is not so much fun when you are living it.  Tension makes life…interesting.  We often apply other words to it.  Stress.  Anxiety.  Fear.  We do not know what happens next.  What if it is not good?

Often, we are comfortable ignoring this tension.  We have a comfortable rhythm in life.  We go to work at our steady job.  The kids go to school.  We engage in our hobbies.  We feel life is predictable and ignore the potential for change.  

Then the change comes.  Job loss.  Relationship change.  Health problems.  The rhythm is disrupted and we wrestle with the fact we do not know what tomorrow will bring.  

Living in the tension of the journey is the essence of the Christian walk.  We know how the story is going to end!  What does the road look like?  Do I really trust that God has my best interests at heart?  

This is often referred to as the tension of the now and not yet.  When Jesus came, The Kingdom of God began.  He was crowned with his crucifixion, resurrection, and ascension.  Yet, the Kingdom is not fully here.  We are commanded to go and tell the good news, that gospel, that the Kingdom has begun and you are invited to be a part of it!  

We are living in the tension of a broken world with the sure hope of a renewed one where we will live at peace with God.  

Is it any surprise that our life feels this way?  

We have to learn to rest in the tension, and that is hard!  This is the essence of faith.  It is easy to rest when we have a good rhythm and can ignore the tension.  It’s much harder to rest when the tension is disrupting our rhythm.

Prayer is the key to rest. I am not skillful at prayer.  I’ve had a cycle in my life where I would pray some because I’m supposed to. I’d enter into a time of increased tension, and I would try to pray more, but I have no idea how.  Well, I know the basics. It’s like if I tried to suddenly run a marathon.  I know how.  Just keep putting one foot in front of the other for 26 miles.  I’m not ready for the difficulty.  I struggle with a new prayer rhythm.  The tension changes, either because it goes away or it becomes my new normal.  I let my prayer life regress because I do not feel the urgency.

I believe, at 43, I am finally breaking through that cycle.  The tension of the past years, which ratcheted up in the past months, drove me to my knees.  I was in the cycle.  As the tension has become my new normal, I’m continuing to pray.  It is so much deeper than any time I was in crisis.  I am praying with brothers and sisters in Christ daily.  What I thought was my new normal with this new amount of tension is changing.  I’m working through emotions faster.  My joy is being renewed more quickly.  Where before it would take days or weeks, not it is taking hours or days.  I have a secure hope that I can get to the point where I can rejoice in the Lord always!  (Phil 4:4)

Are you struggling to pray? Find someone to pray with every day.  Use scripted prayers.  It’s ok to say the Lord’s prayer every day!  It’s ok to use someone else’s words.  I have been using the Daily Prayer app that follows the Book of Common Prayer.  It has been a great model.  

You can find peace in the tension as you pray to God with thanksgiving and supplication.  (Phil 4:7-8)